"Number 2"

Wow, pretty funny that I would be so excited about "number 2", but I am. Nicholas just went "number 2" in the potty!! This was huge!!! He hasn't gone poo in the potty in I am guessing 2 years. A little background before I get right into the nitty gritty. If I have already lost you, I am sorry, I just had to note this special day with a blog.

Nicholas is still in diapers. He is going to be turning 11 this summer. Don't get me wrong, he has had so much success with potty routine. He has come a long way, but it has also been a very long road. Most people are done with the joy of potty training by age 3, maybe 4 if you are unlucky. Maddie was pretty much done at 2 and I remember being so thrilled to not have 2 kids in diapers any longer.

Nicholas' situation is a bit more difficult. He is neurologically impaired, and so the doctors didn't know if he could even go potty on command or have the capability to "hold" it and stay dry for a period of time. But the doctors also said he may never walk, make sounds or be able to communicate in any way also, and he has proved them wrong little by little.

I remember when Nicholas was younger, potty training age, I had hope that he would totally get it. Hope is something you never ever give up but over the years, I have to admit it has wained a bit when it comes to potty training.

Nicholas is brought to the potty every 45 minutes during program which is M-F for most of the regular day hours 8-5. The rest of the time with us during off program hours, we do what we can by bringing him to the potty. We track data every time he goes to the potty. He has an entire potty schedule depending on if he goes, if he is dry, if he is wet and goes, if he initiated and goes, on and on, etc. etc.

i.e. If he is dry and doesn't go, we take him every 15 minutes until he goes, or is wet. If he goes pee, and is dry he gets a break for 5 minutes from his program. If he is wet and doesn't go, he doesn't get a break. It is sad to see him try to get to the living room (where he likes to take a break) when he goes pee but was wet. I still don't think after all this time he understands that he doesn't get a break if he is wet. If he goes poo, he gets a 10 minute break. This is what he got today. I saw on his face that he knew it was an awesome thing that he did.  I still have hope, but not sure that it will happen again any time soon.

I have to say, for me, it is heartbreaking though to have to sit right there with him while he is having such a private moment. Unfortunately, with his seizures and instability sitting up on the potty, for his safety, it will be like this for a long time. 

Potty routine is not only "going" potty on the toilet and being dry in the diaper but it also includes everything from turning on the light switch to washing hands after. All of these things are prompted and originally started with a hand over hand prompt and are now anywhere from an elbow to a bicep prompt.

It is getting more strange to do the diaper thing. Ray and I have gotten it down to a science after all these years. Which diaper is best, how to tape them the best, how many we need to have with us when we go out. We have boxes and boxes of diapers in our garage along with chux and diaper pad inserts and boxes of wipes.We are diaper aficionados I have to say. I remember moving from the cute baby type diapers to the more industrial looking ones as he got older. I was sad. It was something that I really didn't imagine. It felt very "old-folks-home"-like to me. It really is minor in the whole scheme of things now that I look back at it. But at the time, it was like losing a little bit more of my dream of having a child who might "grow" out of these special needs he had as a toddler.

Now, he is in early puberty in all its' glory. This is very weird. It just doesn't seem right for me to see my son like this. He is completely dependent on us though. He doesn't know how to wipe or to stay clean without our help. Very sad but all the more reason for Ray and I to step up to the plate. God knew that he would be in good hands with us, I truly believe that now after all these years. I wonder what it will be like when he is 15 and I am doing this. We will just take it day by day as we always do. At 15 though, I know lifting him off the floor to take him potty will be much more difficult on my back than it already is. Again, all the more reason for Ray and I to take care of us, so that we can take care of him. Gotta go, time for potty for Nicholas. :-)